Actor Holli Dempsey: 'Fear is normal. Say hello to it, but don’t let it get in your way'

My first role was playing Detective Bernstein in my secondary school’s rendition of Little Shop of Horrors. Albeit an unpaid school play, it was probably the most integral learning experience of my early career.

I auditioned – which was just singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star in front of a circle of peers. I got accepted, as did anyone brave enough to open their mouth and emit any noise. Chorus only rehearsed once a week, but I attended every single rehearsal to watch the actors practising and putting the show together. I adored the process.

My drama teacher Ms McBride came up to me one day at a rehearsal and said: “I can see how much you love theatre, you’re here every day. Would you like a speaking role?” I thought: “This is my big break.” It was her belief in my potential that solidified acting as the career I wanted to pursue. I have wanted to thank her ever since.

I was so nervous. I remember pacing the ‘dressing room’ – a tiny, messy storage cupboard – and just willing somebody to take my arm and say: “Don’t worry, you don’t have to go on” – at which point I would have thanked them profusely and run away. Of course, that somebody never came.

Right on cue, I stepped into the lights. And Ms McBride was right – it helps that the lights blind you so that you can’t see the audience. As I delivered my lines, I was sure I was shaking like a leaf in the wind, but afterwards, everybody told me how confident I looked. This was a very valuable lesson: people don’t see you as you see yourself. Once I came off stage, I instantly thought: “I’m so glad nobody stopped me going out there. When can I do it again?”

I’m glad I learned to feel the fear and do it anyway – another important skill for any actor. Fear is totally normal. Say hello to it, but don’t let it get in your way. Anxiety and fear can steal a lot of time and potential, so just face your fears and try. What’s the worst that can happen?

CV Holli Dempsey

Training: No formal training
Theatre includes: The Knowledge, Little Platoons (both at Bush Theatre, London), Spine (Young Vic, London)
TV includes: Derek (Channel 4), Harlots (ITV/Hulu/Starz), Black Mirror (Netflix), I Hate Suzie (Sky), Afterlife (Netflix), Ghosts (BBC) Other credits: Broken Colours, The Miser (BBC Radio 4)
Agent: Curtis Brown